Lumpy Cake Mix
by Chloe Maria LiClaire
Summary: Add a few crazy Americans, mix in a dash of elemental magic, a pinch of teen nuttiness, pour it all into Hogwarts and what do you get? A cake fit for a cannibal!


Dawn was just awakening when the two Americans and their Aurors slipped through the barrier of Platform 9 ¾. Multiple instructions were whispered to the twins who took it all in with solemn faces. Finally, after a through investigation of the train, the siblings were allowed on with a single Auror. The others had left to make sure no suspicions were aroused when the other students arrived. Kingsley Shacklebolt escorted the fifteen-year-olds to the designated compartment, never saying anything, but lending a comforting presence. As the twins got settled in, one of them finally said,

"Can we still can you Uncle?"

Kingsley looked down at the two teens with a sad smile.

"You can always call me Uncle, and I will always answer to that. You are not your father." He bent down and embraced the two as they cried softly.

"Now," he said, minutes later as the tears stopped. "You have a new life ahead of you. Make friends, stick together, I'll contact you frequently, and for goodness sakes, don't blow up any toilets again." This earned a few snickers as the twins dried their faces.

"Think you can handle the rest?" Asked Kingsley as he stood back up.

"I suppose." answered Alexander with a mischievous grin.

"Alexandria?" Kingsley looked down at the other twin.

"Do we have to?" She answered, she own grin matching Alex's.

"Yes, now I'll talk to you two later, and try not to get into too much trouble.

"'Kay." Came the unison response.

Kingsley gave them one last hug before apparating away. At that moment, voices were heard from outside of the train, signaling that the students, both old and new, were arriving.

The twins sat in silence for a few moments, getting used to the feeling that they were no longer attached to the monster that was their father.

"So Alex," Alexa said, trying out her brother's new name. "How shall be introduce ourselves to this new school?"

Alex's trademark grin slowly grew over his face. "How about we do a Black hole, except this time, make it school wide and mirror it?"

"Ooh, that'll be difficult. Why don't instead we focus on the dining hall, pull a Waterfall with a rainbow effect? We've already got the spells for it, its flashy and it gives us a better entrance."

"Hmm, good point." Mused Alex, already seeing the final project in his head.

"So?" Asked Alexa, playing with her wand.

"Alright, we'll do it. Shall we get started?" Alex began to pull out their notebooks.

"Lets." Responded Alexa, handing Alex his mechanical pencil and they got to work outlining their latest prank.

OoOoO

Tonks kept pacing the Auror hallways, waiting for Kingsley to get back. She continued until Moody yelled at her for tripping over everything and making a louder ruckus than giants battling for the right to rule. When Tonks asked as to how he knew that, he responded with "Never you mind, just stop that infernal ruckus!"

So now Tonks was sitting at her desk, doing paperwork that was due last month, trying not to annoy Moody. Finally, Kingsley apparated back into his office, barely making a sound. Tonks attempted to get to Kingsley, but Moody made it there first, due to Tonks's lack of coordination.

"Is the spell holding up?" He asked gruffly.

"Yes, they can only access the memories when they are alone and their emotions are completely calm."

"Good, they don't need any flashbacks of Him just yet." Moody walked back to his office leaving Tonks to talk to Kinsley.

"Are they alright? Are they going to be okay? Did they like the gift I gave them?

"They're rather sad. Yes, they're strong, they'll be able to make it through. What gift?"

Tonks got a rather oh-crap look. "Oops."

OoOoO

The train was almost completely full by the time Alexa and Alex found Tonks's gift in one of their bags. They seemed to be a pair of small, ordinary bags, but when the twins began to mess with them they discovered that both held an assortment of Zonko's best products, some of their own experiments and a note from Tonks. The note read:

"Hey you two, since this is going to be your first year (or fifth, seeing as you are fifteen) at Hogwarts, and I know from experience how you two like to make an entrance I packed some of you previous pranks and some Zonko's stuff in these bags. Now these bags can be enlarged to fit anything in here, even an elephant, and it won't change in weight! Have fun with them, and send me plenty of pictures!

See ya later,

Tonks."

Alex and Alexa resembled Cheshire cats by the end of the note.

"This year is going to be the best year yet."

"And if its not, we'll make it."

Slowly the twins curled back up in their seats and continued to plot for the rest of the trip.

OoOoO

Back at the Ministry, Moody was yelling at Tonks for giving Alexander and Alexandria the Ever-Enlarging-Always-Weightless Bags. Those, he said were dangerous magical objects and you shouldn't just go handing them out to any teenagers. Tonks was yelling back how they weren't just any teenagers and that she thought they could handle that gift, seeing what they had handled in the past. Kingsley was currently writing a memo to the Heath Department about sending down the strongest pain medicine they had. About five minutes later he received it. It didn't help.

All done! So, its completely revamped from the original, I decided I didn't like it. Besides, this one is written better, well I think so. But do YOU??? Well, do ya?


End file.
